Following a romance in my early twenties with an older man who, I eventually accepted, was simply at a different stage of life, I went through a series of short relationships of varying significance.
I met lovely men—many of whom remain my friends—but by my mid-thirties, I still hadn’t met anyone with whom I felt that same degree of connection and passion I had known with my first love.
"I wasn't necessarily looking for a date," he said.
“I’ve been told by well-meaning relatives: ‘Don’t talk about work on a date, dumb it down, and it’s bad to earn so much money because guys will be scared of you.’ And I got the word ‘intimidating’ a lot,” said Alexis, a 35-year-old lawyer in San Francisco. Nearly half of single women believe their professional success is intimidating to the men they meet.
Put another way, many high-achieving women think their success is not helping them find love.
For a generation of SWANS — Strong Women Achievers, No Spouse — these myths have become conventional wisdom.
If you attended a good school, have an impressive job, have career aspirations or dream of future success, men will find you less attractive.
The purported “news” was never good: Smart women are less likely to marry.
Successful men are romantically interested only in their secretaries.
CHAPTER 2 | Overqualified for Love Imagine, as newspapers and magazines recently have, the “plight of the high-status woman.” She is a well-educated young woman in her 30s, earns a good salary, and has a great social life — but she is single and is worried that her success might be the reason she has not met a man to marry.
Any hint of bad news about the successful or talented has always made headlines, but media pessimism about the happiness and life balance of millions of young, career-oriented women has struck a chord nationwide.
And if a woman makes a lot of money, men will be intimidated.